I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
