Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
