I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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