dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
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