Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I wish i was in the wii world.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I lost the right to judge tonight
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
