So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
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