Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize