I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize