dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Randomize
