why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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