I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
