can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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