Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
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He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
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Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
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