Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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