You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
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