I look better un-naked...
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
