Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Randomize
