what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
