I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Randomize
