people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
