you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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