What did we do last night that was yellow?
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
