Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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