so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
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