I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
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