sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
