i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I don't want my vagina anymore.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
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