You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
