Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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