About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
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Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
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Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
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