Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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