They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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