four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
