Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I have post one night stand depression
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