So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
