In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Randomize