Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
