guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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