just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Terrible idea I love it
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
