So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
