So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
