Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
