I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
