I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
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