when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize
