They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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