Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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