you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
