it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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