it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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